I’ve been meaning to post something about this for several days but thankfully it’s still pertinent enough to write about it. The following is the text of an email I got from a friend a week or two ago:
The Paul W. Bryant Museum will be open the week of Spring Break; March 17th thru 21st! Our hours will be 9 a.m. – 4 p. m. The museum will be closed Sunday, March 23, 2008 in observation of Easter.
The Bama Twins will be signing autographs on A-Day from 10 a.m. until Noon.
For more A-Day information, please visit www.uagameday.com.
Who the fuck are the Bama Twins? Tell me they are not talking about who I think they are talking about.
Needless to say, I was intrigued. Like my friend I was hoping that it wasn’t who he, and now I, was thinking it was. Very shortly though good ol’ Google confirmed my fears. These lovely creatures are the “Bama” twins.
What the hell have we come to when these two young women are signing their autographs and on top of that the event is sanctioned by some branch of the university?
First off, what are their names? Let’s say I did want an autograph. One of them could sign it “Betty Crocker” and I wouldn’t be any wiser. How can you get an autograph from someone whose name you don’t even know? The publicity didn’t even say “Daisy and Ellie May, otherwise known as the Bama Twins.” No, it just says the Bama Twins. Has this become common knowledge? I don’t think so. I know a helluva lot about Alabama Football and I don’t know the names of the “Bama Twins”. I could tell you the starting defensive line for the ’99 team but I assure you if you ask me to name just one of the “Bama Twins” I would be at a total loss.
And b, what have they done, other than be good looking twins, to become celebrity enough to warrant someone wanting their signature? Have they donated a bunch of money? Has CBS guaranteed to show the majority of our games if they’ll film an intro? Did they meet each recruit in our consensus number one class as they arrived into town? All I’ve ever seen them do is walk through the Quad and show up for a few seconds on a telecast and all the sudden they’re the next Sela (fucking) Ward.
Granted I am not a big signature seeker. If memory serves the last signature that I personally got was Jill Arrington’s after the ’04 Iron Bowl and the only reason that I did that was because, even in my bourbon fueled misery from the loss, when I found myself face to face with her, I knew that “I think your hotttt!” wasn’t an appropriate thing to say to her while my wife was standing there and “I want to lay you down by the fire and make sweet love to you all night long” probably wouldn’t have been the most classy thing either so I opted for the autograph. But for the love of Pete, she was Jill Arrington, not a nameless twin who wears houndstooth.
Furthermore, I understand that they don’t (and never have attended) the University. I mean, I’m glad their fans and all and I’d give a hug or a “good game” after a really good victory but that doesn’t make them autograph worthy?
What exactly are you gonna do with a Bama Twin autograph anyway? Is there a big ebay market for them? I doubt it. No, it’s probably going to be something more like this: It’s four years from now and your cleaning out a desk drawer prior to moving to a new place.
You: Hey honey, I found this old A-Day program from’08. There’s no reason to keep it is there? I mean it is A-day after all.
Honey: No, no reason I can’t think of. Throw it away.
You: Hey, wait a second. Who the fuck is Betty Crocker? She signed this program here on this page with those girls who used to wear houndstooth hats and go-go boots and walk around campus.
Honey: You mean the famous maker of delicious and easy to make baking products?
You: No, I’m pretty sure she’s dead. Besides she wouldn’t have been at A-day even if she were alive.
Honey: Isn’t that the day you got drunk and you and (name redacted) followed those two girls around begging for me to take your picture with them?
You: You just described every tailgate experience for the last ten years. How am I supposed to know? Screw it. I’m throwing it out.
And that my friends, is the best case scenario.
Now before the hate mail starts, I’m sure they are sweet and dedicated fans. It is not a personal thing against them. I don’t know them so I’m not judging them. This isn’t quite as ridiculous as the Jenn Sterger phenomenon either. To begin with these chicks are like 14 times less slutty. But the fact is they have done about as much to deserve celebrity status as she has. They have looked good and been caught on camera.
And if that is all it takes to be a celebrity, I should have been famous a long time ago.
Picture Me Rollin 
30 comments
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March 27, 2008 at 7:27 am
gerry dorsey
there isn’t much i hate more than people being famous (using the term loosely) for nothing more than being hot (using the term loosely).
on a side note, i have jill arrington’s autograph on a dallas desperados (arena league) mini football. in my defense, my buddy simply got 2 signed and gave me one. i do specifically remember her having an outstanding ass though.
March 27, 2008 at 7:40 am
picturemerollin
There is no need to defend having a Jill Arrington autograph. She was perhaps more beautiful up close than she appeared from a distance (stunning blue eyes). I only wish I hadn’t been hammered and could remember the encounter better.
I miss her. It took me a while to get on board with Erin Andrews and then she quit doing SEC games. We need, and deserve, something better than Tracy Wolfson. I’m not even going to start on Holly Rowe.
March 27, 2008 at 8:00 am
Bill
Jenn Sterger showed me her boobies, and I liked them too!!
March 27, 2008 at 8:19 am
gerry dorsey
i don’t mean to ask for forgiveness for being on board with jill arrington…i was on board then and i’m on board now. and you’re right, she was even hotter in person. i was more asking for forgiveness for the whole autograph thing. i hate “autograph guy.”
March 27, 2008 at 8:24 am
picturemerollin
I understand Gerry. I can’ stand autograph guy either but Jill transcended that and therefore there is no shame.
March 27, 2008 at 8:55 am
marcus aurelius
I have the Ramp Lady’s autograph because…She. Is. Alabama Football. Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!
March 27, 2008 at 11:55 am
MoonDog
I came across that article you posted a while back about SEC teams as Middle Eastern countries. Did you write that or did you find that somewhere and post it?
The reason I’m asking, I saw it again today at Bleacher Report and there was no mention of where the article came from. The guy who posted it is claiming it as his work.
Let me know.
BTW, I’ll be signing autographs Ray-Rays Hot Wings this weekend if you’d like to drop by.
March 27, 2008 at 12:12 pm
picturemerollin
Moondog, I didn’t write that. It was emailed to me and I just posted it. No one was listed as the author so I didn’t know who to give credit to.
If you look as good as Jill Arrington (and you were a girl) I’d think about making the trip.
March 27, 2008 at 12:33 pm
MoonDog
10-4 on the article. I get testy when people post content and claim it as their own when it isn’t. We may be classified as “amateurs” but that doesn’t mean we should act like it.
No, I’m not a woman. If I were, I’d look nothing like Jill. With my luck I’d end up looking like Joan Rivers, or worse, if that’s possible.
March 30, 2008 at 9:50 pm
theone
good job, may I ask is your life really that boring that you spend it writing things about those girls? ive only heard nice things about them so what is it hurting you?
March 31, 2008 at 12:50 pm
gerry dorsey
yeah!!! ya big meanie!!!
April 2, 2008 at 12:12 am
3rd Down H-Back
I love the way you Bammers try to claim these two girls even though they belong to UAB.
If the Barn had two twins that got this much attention just for showing up to Shreveport bound teams, I would bet they wouldn’t be attending Troy State.
And before anyone says anything, it is still Troy State in my eyes, not Troy. And the best basketball team in Memphis is Memphis State, not the new name.
April 2, 2008 at 9:13 am
picturemerollin
Hey 3DHB, they’re obviously daywalkers but Alabama tends to get an awful lot of that. At least they go to school somewhere unlike a large portion of Little Brothers fan base, who own chickens and feel they have to support Auburn for the Poultry Science angle.
If Little Brother even had girls this good-looking how would they distinguish themselves? Wear Orange and Blue? Not date their brother? (Actually the last one would make them stand out.)
I agree with you on the “State” thing. There is no need to get all fancy and try to go with the more prestigious sounding, single-name-without-state. I do find it curious that you still call it Troy State and Memphis State and not Alabama Polytechnic Institute. But whatever you call it, it’s still the best damn Poultry Science Department in the state. War Damn Eagle!!!!
theone: Yes, my life is absolutely that boring. Is your life so busy that you can’t read through complete articles and comprehend their full scope? My intention was not to disparage them as people – hence the statement to that effect in the last paragraph – but rather to point out how little people have to do to become celebrities. I’d feel much better about the whole deal
if they were noted for their charity work instead of being pretty blondes in houndstooth. At least then we might know their names – which I would be willing to bet that you don’t know without looking up. At any rate I appreciate you dropping by and offering your opinion, unfortunately it was ill-informed, but keep trying, I am certain that you can add something to the discussion.
January 10, 2010 at 12:59 pm
Self
Hey, Dumb Dumb! If you want to trash them in print, know what you are talking about. They ARE noted for their charity work for the Ronald McDonald House and volenteering over 200 hours in the medical field when they lived at home…….among many other charitable work that they do for their church and community.
April 2, 2008 at 3:43 pm
3rd Down H-Back
Troy State is Troy State because they were officially called Troy State at one point in my life time. The Barn hasn’t been API or EAMC in my life time, or yours. You Bammers are always living in the past. RTR
There are plenty of fine women at Auburn. To me the fact that they may actually be getting a degree in something that will help them contribute to society more than a 4 year English or, my personal favorite, a BS in Psychology makes them even hotter. And Alabama, as well as all colleges in the south, have more than their fair share of hot women compared to the rest of the nation.
April 14, 2008 at 9:31 am
wolf
I did but I’ve actually known the twins since before all this recognition. They both r very involved at a church n their town and have done stuff for the ronald mc house. The whole signing event is to raise money for the Bear Bryant musuem. Why don’t u talk about things on the Internet u actually “know” about. I say kudos to them for representing the university n a classy manner and actually trying to help out Alabama. Very sweet girls and I’m proud to say I know them.
April 14, 2008 at 9:47 am
picturemerollin
Wolf, what I “know” is that “r” is spelled a-r-e and that “n” is spelled i-n. We aren’t texting each other like 12 year old girls. We are writing the English language.
What I also “know” is that out of the people that have bothered to stick up for the girls-that haven’t even disparaged by me – no one has bothered to tell me their names. I am sure – as I said in the original post – that they are probably great girls, they just, in my opinion, have done nothing to deserve fame. When they are referenced they are not called the Bama Twins- champions of the Ronald McDonald House and their Church. They are called the “Bama Twins” and they don’t even attend my alma mater.
Here’s a tip for you wolf, google “bama twins” and go spread justice to the people all over the internet who actually say something negative about them and stay the hell off my yard.
April 14, 2008 at 10:15 am
wolf
Who cares if they don’t attend your alma mater. Obviously they have done more for the university than you have. Please share with us who you are and what you have done for Bama and we will all go on our merry way. My guess is you are the typical loser writhing about these girls…a 240 shorty living life to dog other people to make yourself feel better and only jealous because these classy girls wouldn’t even glance your direction. All I’m saying is if you don’t know the real facts….dont post things. Were you spending your Aday raising money for the Bryant musuem by selling your autograph? I don’t think so. The whole fact that we are even talking about them proves they have gained much fame. I do know their names and have read much about them on the Internet. I hope they arnt sitting at home reading this nonsense. But come on picturemerolling share with us what you have done for bama??
I typed out every word for better understanding on your part.
April 14, 2008 at 10:53 am
picturemerollin
Wolf – This isn’t a news source. It’s a place to offer my opinion. My opinion is that these two beautiful, intelligent, sweet, God-fearing girls haven’t done anything that makes me want to have their autograph. Facts do not exist to prove otherwise so I don’t feel inclined to present any. I never said a single word that disparaged their character or them personally. I am sorry that you took offense by my opinion of the situation. You are entitled to your opinion just like me but I believe that you missed the point in your zeal to defend your friends.
I am afraid that I don’t know what a 240 shorty is, so I can’t comment on that. I do dog people on occasion but I am also quite liberal with praise when it is warranted. I don’t consider myself a loser but I would point out that now you have done what no one up to this point in this debate has done; called someone else a name.
I spent my A-day working in my yard and taking my youngest child to the game. I’m also married, to a woman that I find much more attractive and classy than your friends -whom you still don’t name. I am not saying they are unattractive or not classy just that I find my wife more so based on the limited information I have of them. The point is I’m not really concerned whether they look my way or not. (In fairness, they probably would look my way as I am pretty damn good looking myself, but you can’t fault them for that.)
As far as my identity and my contributions to my alma mater. They are both known by those that need to know them and I have no desire to prove myself to someone who calls for openness and remains nameless.
I don’t give my identity because of people like you, who despite their efforts to right a wrong, miss the point.
If I have in any way caused these girls in pain by my comments, despite their casting themselves in the public eye and inviting both praise and criticism alike, I sincerely apologize. Once again, I am sorry that you, Wolf, obviously took offense. It was a weak attempt on a little read blog to speak to the absurdity of celebrity in our time. I hope your friends aren’t too victimized by that. However, I stand by my opinion that their autograph is not to be desired. I exercised my belief of my opinion by not seeking their autograph. I hope the Bryant Museum doesn’t fold because I didn’t do my part. [Wait a second, people paid for their autographs? I guess some people are dumber than I gave them credit for. Did you pay for an autograph?]
Thank you for attempting spell things correctly, while not error free, you did a much better job and I think that you’ll find as you go about defending the defenseless that you’ll be taken more seriously if you take our language, which can be a thing of beauty, with the seriousness you take to perceived offenses to your friends.
Good luck and Godspeed.
January 10, 2010 at 2:49 pm
Self
Hey, accept that our society is captivated by beauty and by the unordinary. What has Paris Hilton ever done? What has Nicole Richey accomplished to make herself well known? Why is it that every move made by Jon and Kate Gosselin is reported on TV? Most people know who Jim Bob and Michelle Dugger are. So if the Bama Twins, MAEGEN AND ASHLEY BAILEY, are recognized for their beauty times 2 and a hounds tooth hat why is that so unusual? They wore a hounds tooth hat to a Bama game. How is that casting themselves in the public eye for praise and criticism? Yes, they did accept some offers, paid and unpaid, the main purpose being to help them in their career path and job hunting. It can’t hurt to be “recognized.”
On a personal note, the thing that really stands out is that most beautiful girls get involved in the party scene in college and compromise their values. And these girls are beautiful and attract attention! Even before they metamorphosed into the Bama Twins, and if only one of the girls walked through Wal Mart, every eye was upon her and heads turned to get a better look. These girls are not just another pretty face. There is something majestic in their height and body carriage, or whatever it is that they have. There dress and actions do not shout “Look at me!” There demeanor is unusual because, while most pretty young girls are loud and outspoken, these girls are naturally quiet, and when they talk to each other, it is almost like they have their own language. They have had to develop the ability to be more outspoken in order to become an effective speaker for their careers, charity and volunteer work. Even though they have taken advantage of their public recognition for financial purposes and preparation for a career, they are not out to be show boaters.
And as long as you and “Wolf” are squabbling over spelling and language, I would suggest that you take a vocabulary course to lean more expressive and appropriate adjectives to replace the “common” words that you use for emphasis because you haven’t the words to express yourself at a higher level.
January 10, 2010 at 2:57 pm
Self
Whoops! There should by their—please forgive the oversight!
April 14, 2008 at 11:20 am
Mark W
To rollin…..By saying that people are stupid for paying for their autographs… you are name calling and saying unneeded remarks. Be glad they are helping out OUR alma mater. There was no need for the topic to be posted in the first place. You are welcome to your opinion but keep the negative ones to yourself. By stating in a blog (that is seen over the Internet) the letters WTF? proves that you are not a very classy individual. I am a fellow bama grad and very happy to see the girls who are in fact named Ashley and Maegen. (spelling?) Keep it up girls! Oh and I was one of the individuals standing in line to pay for their autographs.
April 14, 2008 at 11:48 am
picturemerollin
Mark- Thanks for being the first to give their names.
I do think you are silly (or stupid) for standing in line for an autograph of Ashley and Maegan. I hope you can sleep tonight with that knowledge.
I’m going to let the post speak for itself. I’ve grown bored of restating my opinion.
How bad would it be if I start in on the tatoo guy that wears the kilt?
April 14, 2008 at 12:44 pm
The Noodle
Whoa man! Don’t start on the guy with the kilt. People will be coming out of the woodwork telling you how he goes to Church, worked at a McDonalds, or just how great of a person he is.
BTW (is this still considered classy) I didn’t see in your post where you were being negative towards the twins. So I don’t understand the attacks from their “loyal followers”. But then again, I am not trying to justify standing in line and PAYING for their autographs.
April 14, 2008 at 1:36 pm
Bill
Hey wolf, what is a 240 shorty? It sounds like a term i might want to run with, if it means what I think it means. Why would anyone want anyones autograph. That makes no sense to me. But hey WTF!
April 15, 2008 at 7:06 pm
The Noodle
Mark W-
How much did it cost to get the autograph from the twin(s)?
April 17, 2008 at 9:16 pm
theone
i talked to them, the pics were 5 but autographs were free, they signed whatever you had or took a picture with you and that was free
April 18, 2008 at 9:39 am
3rd Down H-Back
Holy shit! PMR really kicked the beehive with this post.
And the UAB twins are Maegen and Ashley Bailey.
April 18, 2008 at 11:17 am
The Noodle
Thanks for the answer theone.
I still have a hard time understanding instant fame for looking & dressing alike. I guess I’ll never figure that one out.
Besides, I could only imagine my wife’s response if I did have the desire for a picture and/or an autograph of two pretty girls. I think “pervert” might be a word that the Mrs. would use.
July 30, 2008 at 2:36 pm
Joe Bailey
Hey there just for clarification their names are Ashley and Megan Bailey and as you can see by my name they are my cousins. Also they both went to UAB and their mom(Anna) and dad(Jimmy) are huge Auburn fans. They are only doing it for publicity and it makes me sick to my stomach their mom (my aunt) is a nut job. It’s all for attention and they have never really been Alabama fans.