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[My new name for the roundup/link type posts]

I spent all weekend in front of the television and only saw him make one shot. Alabama’s Michael Thompson did indeed make the cut at the U.S. Open and took it a step farther by finishing 72 holes at 8-over tied for 29th and the low amateur. Congratulations Michael and best of luck to you as you start your pro career.

This is not as good as it sounds. Alabama senior signal caller Ross’ Brother (John Parker) Wilson has been named to the Johnny Unitas  Award watch list. According to the folks that give out the award it “takes athletic performance into consideration as well as off-the-field values of good character, citizenship, scholastic achievement and strong leadership.”

Which sounds nice in theory until you look at the other senior quarterbacks up for the award and find the name: Rhett Bomar, who in my opinion sets the bar for “off-the-field values”. In addition to the absolute best bangs in the conference, Ross’ Brother also is the owner of a DUI citation, which he received as a redshirt freshman (I think). I haven’t gone into details of the other watch list members but I’m thinking that the status of the award has taken a hit.

To clarify, I’m certain that both Bomar and Wilson have learned from their transgressions and are walking the straight and narrow and should be congratulated for that but if you’re going to give an award that claims to hold character in high regard then I think the candidates should have led unsullied lives up to this point. Besides, we already have a system to reward those who have screwed up and (cough, cough) straightened themselves out. It’s called elected office.

Also to clarify, in the event that Ross’ Brother leads the Tide to many victories or a few vivtories over certain rivals, I will propose that my wife have another child, just so that I can name it John Parker, be it a male or female.  I will also go on endlessly about how I have always loved the guy and knew that he was the man all along; as well as refer to him by his given name.

If he had his way. Doug Gillette continues his interesting look at what would have happened in past seasons if the old bowl system had implemented a “plus one” game to determine the national champion. In this installment he looks at the ’03 season. [Ed. Note: I’ve shamelessly ripped of Doug enough where I feel the need to provide a link and acknowledge his greatness plus this is a semi-sorta mea culpa for referring to his Georgia Bulldogs as Johnny-come-latelys in my post about the ‘07 Alabama-Georgia game.]

And finally, Haiku:

The temps are getting higher

Cleared players lower

Saban knows what he’s doing?

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Disclaimer: This post will mostly be about my trip to Las Vegas. It will end with a poem, but if you’re here for the poetry, you’ve got some scrolling to do.

I’m back at in the office this morning after a long weekend in Las Vegas. My wife and I flew out there to celebrate our tenth anniversary. I’m convinced that Vegas is an entirely different universe than most of us live in, especially in the South, but it can be a lot of fun if it is enjoyed correctly and in measured doses. In honor of occasional reader Clay Travis, I’m gonna break it down DDT style:

1. When we arrived at McCarran Airport on Thursday, I had arranged to have a stretch limo pick us up. I did this because I thought, that like me, my wife had never been in a limo. It was to be a surprise to her and when we saw the driver waiting for us at the bottom of the escalator leading to baggage claim, I said, “surprise”. Looking completely unsurprised my wife, who knew that I had gotten a shuttle for us and assumed that the driver was for it, says in reply, “you should have waited until I actually saw the limo to say ‘surprise'”. Then on the drive down the strip she informs me that she had been in a limo, for a friend’s birthday trip to a Birmingham restaurant, only six months ago.

2. Everything in Las Vegas is four times higher than here. That’s scientifically proven. The bad thing is that even though you realize this, within twenty-four hours of your arrival you have no problem with it and run through money like it were ranch-covered cheese-fries and you haven’t had a single carbohydrate in two weeks. To prove this point, by Friday evening we were using up minatures from the mini-bar (at $8 a pop) like they were cocktail nuts, when only the day before we had looked at them as if the use of one would break the kid’s college fund.

We had one meal less than $60 and that was two omelets and a glass of orange juice for $36. I expected to pay big money for the big evening meals but $70 for a light lunch, $7 for a beer, and $12 for a mixed drink is a little crazy. But sure as I am sitting here, you just forget about it once you’re there – that is until you get home and look through your receipts. Citibank sent me a thank you email this morning.

3. The food is amazing. I didn’t eat anything that wasn’t wonderful. Our two big evening meals were out of this world. The first night we ate at Aureole in Mandalay Bay. This is the place that you see on TV that has the four-story wine tower and they suspend girls with cables and harnesses to stock and retrieve the wine selections.

I love to eat but don’t consider myself a foodie and this place was on the border of being pretentious but once our waiter figured us out the service was incredible just like the food. I had Ahi tuna and veal shank with a great bottle of New Zealand Pinot Noir. Fabulous!.

The next night, which was our actual anniversary, we ate at Emeril’s Delmonico Steakhouse in the Venitian. I had been there before and this was just as good as I remembered it. Can you say 52oz bone-in rib eye? I don’t have enough command of the English language to express to you how good it was. And if the food was great the service was better. It was one of those meals that you can only afford to do once every year because of the price but it was totally worth it. My mouth is actually watering as I think about it.

4. The faux-hawk needs to stop. Right now. This has got to be the worst idea in men’s hair fashion. Ever. I believe that it is an annoucement to every one that sees you that a.) you are probably a total douchebag, b.) your desire to be cool is overiding your sense not to look like an idiot, and c.) you are a follower to the point that you would jump of a bridge if you perceived that “everybody else was”. This hairstyle actually makes “bama bangs” look somewhat acceptable. And it was everywhere in Vegas.

I have rule when it comes to clothes and hairstyles; if you are going to look at a picture of yourself sporting a style in two or more years and you’ll look foolish or say to yourself, “what was I thinking”, then just say no. Unless it is to specifically get a laugh.

Attention fauw-hawk wearers: Stop! Now!

It’s not in the least bit of a statement of self expression like a real mohawk is. It’s a cry of desperation that sounds something like, “I will do anything to make others think I fit in.”

5. Jet Lag sucks. It not just the jet lag and time difference, which is two hours, it’s also the lifestyle in Vegas. And the combination make it tough to rebound from and meld back into normal existence. I’ve had surgical procedures that were easier to recover form than a weekend in Vegas. We actually got back late Saturday night and I had yesterday to recover and I still don’t fell like myself today. We did blow it out on Friday night and drink quite a bit but still , in all seriousness, I drink more on any given football weekend. The thing is the environment there is just not conducive to sleep, at least restful sleep.

The latest we were up was 12:30, which isn’t late by any stretch, but that is 2:30 to our bodies. Then we slept – or tried to- until 8:30, but that is 10:30 here. My body is so programed to waking up at 5:30, even though I usually lay in bed until 6:00, but at any rate my brain didn’t get the vacation memo and had me up at 3:30 local time both mornings. Granted, it was still dark but my body was trying to tell me to get going from that point on. So, while I was in bed for five more hours it was hardly what you would call restful sleep.

That’s enough for this post. I’ll give you the rest of the trip points, including clubs, gambling, and hookers, later in the week.

Now, for the Haiku:

the children on Senior Trip

will soon have to learn

that come Fall they must be men

You know what I thought about A-Day? I’ll tell you: It was A-Day.

It’s a glorified scrimmage and it’s just hard to say anything definitive. Some guys looked good and some looked bad. I bleleive that we didn’t see a whole lot of the offense and that was really the mian thing I was hoping for. My belief that the fans witnessed a vanilla package was backed up by comments that Nick Saban and some of the other players made.

I decided that my four-year-old would get his first taste of Bryant-Denny Stadium on Saturday. It was neat from the standpoint that he was predictably amazed but since he wanted a drink form about the moment our backsides hit our chairs and we left at half time, I just didn’t get to concentrate on football. The best moment of the day came when my son -who was rocking his #34 crimson jersey that no longer has the numbers on the front- looked up and me and said, “I’m gonna play football down there one day Daddy.” I almost cried. The sad fact is that he is cursed with my genes so that eventuality is doubtful, but you know reality never stopped me from wanting something, from playing for Coach Bryant to dating Elle McPherson. If your gonna dream kid, dream big.

Random thought ans links:

  • Gerry Dorsey sums up my sentiments about A-Day. I go to the game because it’s a chance to see a little football five months before actual football, but if I had to drive more than 15 minutes I wouldn’t do it.
  • Saban moves well for an older man rocking loafers.
  • For the first time in I don’t know when, I was in front of the television for every hole of the Masters. I did take a couple of quick naps but all in all, a great day on the couch. I did find myself rooting for Tiger after the 70′ putt on No. 11- just to make it interesting – but I believe that Immelman deserved the win. The cool thing was that when I was at the practice round on Monday, I got to watch him and Gary Player play the 16th. They walked within 6′ of me and at the time I had no idea I was watching the future champion.
  • Your Monday Football Haiku (which has been absent for the last few weeks, sorry).

Spring satisfies not

The yearning for real football

Hurry blessed fall

Have a great week!

This blog is starting to gain a little attention and momentum, so I should really be hitting you with muy y interesante posts but unfortunately I am looking at what may prove to be two very stressful and busy weeks with the real job.

I am not saying I’ll be absent, just that posting will be light with a mix of none. I have found that this is good release for me though. So, don’t be surprised to find a rant about how I “am not a dog person” or how Tuberville has his headphones custom made to fit his enormous ears.

So here is the Monday Football Haiku (I wasn’t joking about that):

Off Season is long

Hoops is a poor trade off

Beating Vandy helps

That’s just a pitiful effort and I apologize but it is a picture into how uncreative I am feeling right now with the stress of work bearing down.

At least Rashad Johnson got his charges dropped. I can now cancel the order for the “Free Rashad” tee shirts I was having printed up.

And I leave you with this:

Have a great week.

Last week was a good week, in the sense that a lot of people checked out this here blog thanks to the good ship Swindle and company over at EDSBS. The problem now becomes, how do I keep you entertained and coming back.

I was thinking recently that I do not have any regular features on this blog and wanted to add one. My desire was that it would be ridiculously simple and yet flexible and entertaining enough to keep people coming back for more.  I also liked the idea of a Monday thing and thus had even more reason to keep it simple.

Last week, on the day that this was WordPress’ “fastest growing blog“, the blog in second place was called 22 Words.  The point of 22 Words is to get to the point of any topic in 22 words or less. I like this and while I’ll be the first to admit that if I have ever uttered anything funny or intelligent, someone else said it first, I didn’t want to copy that straight away.

But I came up with something else that I believe is closely related and thus proudly present to you the first Picture Me Rollin’ regular feature, Football Haiku:

Now, joy in Bama

Not on the court or diamond

No arrests this week

So there you have it. Now please make this somewhat fun and add your own. The only rules is that it must be a Haiku in the loosest sense of the form; five, seven, and five syllables. It should also have something to do with football, preferably college, but I won’t get to picky.

Have a great week!

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